• Shopping for more “stylish” clothes means unripped and unstained sweats and sweatshirts.
• You tell your hairdresser not to cut your hair because you like the look of a long pony tail.
• You eat lunch at 10:30am because you had breakfast 5 hours ago!
• You have more wine in your shopping cart than food.
• You get excited when the mail gets here, because it gives you something to do.
• You have kids show theme songs in your head all day and night.
• You know what poop tastes like.
• You say that you have to go “potty” even when the kids aren’t around.
• Every purse that you look to buy seems too small.
• “Me time” consists of cleaning the kitchen floor while your husband takes the kids upstairs for baths.
• You have said, “do that one more time and you are going to time out,” atleast 5 times before noon.
• You stopped having time to shave above the knee.
• You feel more normal when someone else’s kid has a break down in public.
• Taking a bath seems too exhausting since you would have to take the 20 animals and squeaky toys out first.
• You get excited for kid free events because others get to see what you are actually “supposed” to look like.
• You are asked daily, “Mommy, is that water or alcohol?”
• All you want is time to your self but the moment you have it you miss your kids.
• You start a blog so that you can air out your dirty laundry!

• You go on a much needed vacation with your husband and end up watching home movies of the kids when you get there.

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