You know the song, “I’m too sexy?” Well, um..it definitely wasn’t created with me in mind and I am sure that most everyone who knows me would agree. I have always been more of a joker than a romantic at heart and have trouble taking most things seriously, especially myself.
My husband, Pete, knew what he signed up for when he married me. When he promised to love me as I am a little over 7 years ago he knew that I would be wearing sweats and a sweatshirt to bed until “death do us part.” He also knew that I would announce in group settings things like how my legs hadn’t been shaved for days or that I once pooped in an ex boyfriend’s shower.
After having 3 kids, marriage tends to be thrown on the back burner. We know that we love each other and will be happy to focus on us in about 18 years….until then it’s all about the kids.
A few months ago while Pete was finishing putting the last kid down I got an impulsive idea. We have a rather large bathtub in our bathroom and it was one of the things I was excited about when selecting our home. I quickly emptied out all of the kid toys and filled the bath with water and lots of bubbles.
I was so excited at my plan because it was so NOT like me. I lit a million tea lights all over the bathroom and turned the lights down low as I hopped in the tub waiting for Pete to walk in. I sat there wondering how I should pose for when he walked in, and decided that laying back relaxing in the water would set the scene nicely. The bubbles surrounded me and the lit candles gave a romantic glow to the room….this was going to shock him.
All of the sudden I noticed a horrible smell. Apparently my sexy hair had attached itself to a few of the candles and was up in flames. I jumped up and started splashing my hair with water to extinguish the ever growing fire that was in my hair. I finally put it out and that is the moment when Pete walked in with a disgusted look on his face and asked what in the heck that smell was. I stood there…less hair than I started with and in a hurry to escape the burnt hair smell that had filled our bathroom.
I am not sexy….I am funny. I am ok with that and I always will be.